


The Hearts Knows its way

by Locallymoon



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Emotional, Flashbacks, Little bit of Johndo in the beginning, M/M, Married Couple, Reminiscing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:41:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26561560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Locallymoon/pseuds/Locallymoon
Summary: “Just like you and your loved one” Jaehyun asked the waiter for another bottle of Soju. “Actually that time I really think that you changed a lot when you were coming back from Chicago and started dating him” Jaehyun laugh, hitting Johnny shoulder. “He really did good things for you, your past could never.”“You fucker, so this is how you treat our 10 years of friendship?, ”“I swear I speak nothing but truth, your honor”In which Johnny and Jaehyun reunites and talk about the past, not all of it are pretty, but each of them are precious.
Relationships: Jung Yoonoh | Jaehyun/Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung, Moon Taeil/Suh Youngho | Johnny
Comments: 4
Kudos: 52





	The Hearts Knows its way

**Author's Note:**

> Just a note that Gopchang is a grilled cow intestines. The last part Taeil call Johnny "Youngho" because Johnny wants it, that's why it become Youngho only at the end.
> 
> The italic words means that it's all in the past, so I hope it's not too confusing because there's quite a lot of flashback here.
> 
> Also English is not my first language :) I hope you all enjoy this!

Johnny came out from his car after he parked within the street near the store where he was supposed to meet Jaehyun. It was a small old traditional restaurant that sells Soju and Gopchang, a place he used to frequent in the past when he was still a college student. From far away he can still see the soju poster that the owner put in front of it’s window, the model has changed but the brand is still the same, the owner still put all that crates of beer in the front, and the orange plastic tent for people who want to eat outside.

Now to add to that equation, there is also Jaehyun there, looking crisp as ever, but now looking more pristine with a white shirt and blue tie that has been loose around his neck, two button off and rolled up sleeves, concentrating on his phone.

“Yo Jae!”

“Oii John!” Jaehyun looks up from his phone and smiles while he extends his arm to get a bro fist with Johnny. “You sly jerk, how come you’re late when you’re the one that invites me”

“Sorry, I don’t remember the traffic around this area is so bad” Johnny said, taking out the plastic stool to sit, he put his wallet and key to the table and loosen up his tie, he already put his blazer on the car, so he rolled his long sleeve and put one button off, mirroring Jaehyun’s look.

“This place hadn’t changed one bit seriously”

“The only thing changed is the Soju sign in front, remember? It used to be Zico for years and now they change the model every year.” Jaehyun takes a shot from his glass.

Johnny took the menu and search for his favorite dish from the past. “Yeah I remember, you used to take a fight with him when you’re drunk because you thought he gives you the side glance”

“Gosh, fuck you I was drunk and stupid back then, you want some drink?” Jaehyun offered the green bottle that he had to Johnny.

“Nah" He points out his key on the table "I’m driving so nope, you don’t bring your car?”

“Doyoung is having a late night shift today so today I might just use a taxi”

Jaehyun and Doyoung have been married for three years, just a year after Johnny. Doyoung continues to practice as a pediatric surgeon while Jaehyun works as a government worker at the ministry. It was quite hard to manage both of their schedules but it worked in the end. They live near the hospital where Doyoung worked at, it’s quite far from Jaehyun’s workplace, but since Doyoung often got emergencies it was best that they live near the hospital, it’s also quite far from the bustling city that they could get a bigger place with a cheaper price so that’s a plus. But that also means his friend is living far from their group friend, so Johnny really appreciates the time when he can just meet with his friend and reminisce about the past.

Just then the waiter comes with the food, and Johnny also adds some of his order even though Jaehyun already bought enough food for both of them "I just miss their rolled egg" Johnny shrugs. They both thanked the waiter and were now eating the food, while Jaehyun drink his shot.

“You know John, I just hope he doesn’t push himself too hard? He recently covering two of his resident who just got into labor” Jaehyun just put both his hands and covering his face, reminded of how tired and sick Doyoung are after covering two shift plus his shift for a week, Doyoung still answer all of his work mate who messaged him about his work even with his half-conscious state because of the high fever, Jaehyun has to put the phone in the living room and cuddling Doyoung so he can get a comfortable sleep. "I'm fine because that's what he loves, but I also don't want him to get sick, I really can't get used to that, anything but that."

“Yeah yeah I know, he used to go really hard on himself”

“Yep, remember that when he used to date you? Even after all his lecture, club, and even debate competition he still comes to your small book-reading club?”

"Oh, I really wouldn't forget that"

.

.

_ They used to be such a campus couple too, what with Doyoung popularity as a head of their faculty debate organization, medical campus top student, and also part of the professor research team. Also, almost everyone knows about Johnny, as DJ for all their campus music festival, and radio host at night, he participates in all of the events at campus as a photographer too, his kind and easy going personality is the one that makes him known around the campus. _

_ Beside all of that, Johnny also used to join a small book-reading club, is full of people who want to read but never got into is, so the club encourage you to read, it is a club that is open for all, founded by the university library, and he was a coordinator at that time. He remembers how Doyoung always never missed the meet since he asked him to join, even with all his busy schedule at day, he always managed to go to the meeting at night. _

_ One time Johnny eventually asked him that it's okay if he was busy, he can just message him or something and Johnny will understand. _

_ "But, I like you. It is my sacrifices to have less sleep and time, that I choose to made for you, and all of things that I like" Doyoung said, looking at Johnny, he continued to walk in front of him "Also, you look so happy while doing that book reading, it’s a nice return, seriously”, he looking back, smiling at Johnny. He remembers how Doyoung was shining so brightly with all his passion, how big his dream is, yet the small thing in his life is what keeps him alive. _

_. _

_. _

“You last for a year right? At that time?”

.

.

_ They didn’t work out, both of them lit up their own fire so big that they ended up being burnt by their own misunderstanding. Johnny learns a lot from it, and he knows Doyoung too. They let the snowfall become the witness of each of their downfall that day. _

_. _

_. _

“Yeah,we broke up a week after I met you at that annual music event held by your faculty right?” Johnny took a Kimbap and ate it along with Gopchang.

Jaehyun just laughs “Gosh yeah, I remember how I wonder where are our photographer events at, only to see him arguing with a cute bunny behind the stage.” He takes a bite of his food.

“Even at times like that you can still see him cute, you guys are really made for each other.”

“Just like you and your loved one” Jaehyun asked the waiter for another bottle of Soju. “Actually that time I really think that you changed a lot when you were coming back from Chicago and started dating him” Jaehyun laugh, hitting Johnny shoulder. “He really did good things for you, your past could never.”

“You fucker, so this is how you treat our 10 years of friendship?, ”

“I swear I speak nothing but truth, your honor”

.

.

**_January_ **

_ Johnny met Taeil through the book-reading club. They have always been good acquaintances, noticing each other and smiling when their eyes meet, bringing up a light chat when needed. At that time Taeil was in the last year of his college and he joined the book club a year before him. He never comes late (truly an opposite from Johnny) and he really likes how his voice sounds when he tells people about the book that he was reading. He also takes his time when picking a book, and likes to roam around the library. _

_ They actually become close because of the radio, three months after his breakup. You see, Johnny is a radio host for the Monday and Friday Uni’s radio club section at 10PM called Night-Night. It’s a relaxing activity that he truly loves, usually he gonna play music, read some letter, giving advices for them, and then there will be students that they hire to fill in for 3 minutes, it can be for singing, poetic, comedy, or anything, people can email them to join the show, or the radio production members will find someone to filled in. _

_ “Johnny? Is that you?” A familiar face comes to Johnny’s peripheral view “Ah, you’re hosting Night-night today?” _

_ Surprised, Johnny’s eyes got wider as he walked to Taeil's side “Oh! Taeil-hyung! Nice to see you here, yeah I’m hosting today, what about you? What are you doing here? ...not that I mean anything, I just wondered” _

_ “Yooa asked me to sing some songs, fill in the 3 minute slot she said” Taeil said pointing at the keyboard near the radio host seat, “Is that where I’m gonna sing?” _

_ “Yeah, it is, we will probably start in like 20 minutes or so, the crew need to prepare things before we go on-air” Johnny took Taeil to the only couch in the studio. “We can just….wait here if that’s ok with you”. _

_ “No problem, Yooa actually briefed me before I came so that’s fine” They sit together on the small couch, legs touching each other, with how much space Johnny’s leg takes and how small the sofa is, there’s no way they could sit apart from each other. _

_ Then come the awkward silence. _

_ Sure he knew Taeil and they talked sometime at the club, but it was never only the two of them. _

_. _

_. _

“OH MY GOD! I REMEMBER THAT!” Jaehyun scream on top of his lung, he laugh so hard he chokes on his own “Oh my god, oh god, I remember coming there to help setting up the machine and see the two of you sit in that fucking tiny couch, gosh Taeil looks really scared of you”

“Fuck you, I’m not that scary!” Johnny raise up his voice, making the waiter that came to their table startled, he apologized and the waiter put Soju and rolled egg on their table.

“Yeah you are, but aren’t you getting cozy after that? I think I remember I see you guys together on that cafe near the social science building laughing the next week”

“Well, you know how we asked him to be regular right? because of that I treat him to some coffee, and I think we hit it off after that, you know how the rest” Johnny eat his rolled egg “Gosh I miss this so much.”

Jaehyun eat the rolled-egg “Wow, this taste didn’t change at all” He munched on the egg while checking the notification on his phone “Wait Johnny, actually you never tell me when did you actually confess to him? you just said you guys are together when we meet after your short-term exchange to Chicago.

"Well..."

.

.

**_March_ **

_ Taeil and Johnny are at the library, Johnny really needs to study for their quiz, and Taeil is there to find a book for his bachelor thesis. They sit side by side at the small table near the end of the library, facing the campus lake. Johnny takes a break from his note and looks up to see Taeil, today he is wearing an oversized cream sweater, his brown hair looks fluffy, and overall he looks gorgeous. _

_ “Hey-Johnny-hey” _

_ “Wh-what?” _

_ “Don’t what me you big bear, have you finished your study? I think I’m going to rest after this, I have enough references for this part already” Taeil closed his laptop and gather his things “if you want, we could go to the usual cafe, I feel like some sweet things today” _

_ “Baby, can I ask you something?” Johnny said, looking straight at Taeil who was still busy packing his bag, already used with Johnny and all his nicknames. _

_ “Hmm? sure, oh gosh where is my highlighter” _

_ “I like you,” Johnny said, and at that moment Taeil froze. _

_ The thing about Johnny is, when he likes someone, he has no patience, he tells them bluntly in their face, take it or leave it. Feelings are never complicated for him. _

_ “.....Johnny, no-I can’t now” Taeil finally looks up to see Johnny staring at him. _

_ “You don’t like me?” _

_ “No, I don’t say it like that, but it can’t be now” _

_ “....why?” _

_ “I know how you went through a bad breakup, and I don’t want you to waste your time on-” _

_ “Taeil you’re never the waste of time and...I already over my breakup” _

_ “I-I just don’t think right now is the right time for this. But…” Taeil bring his hands to his lap “If you’re willing to wait, if you’re being patience...I will try to come around….somehow” _

.

.

“SHIT, you seriously got rejected?” Jaehyun's face is red already and he leans on his hand to look at Johnny. 

“Yeah, and then the next week I just-zooom- went into exchange, and I only tell him like, two days before I go”

“Oh gosh you bitch, then what? you make him wait?”

“What? No! We are not children anymore, of course I left him my email and my messenger ID, we talk less, but we were talking at least” Johnny check his phone, and notice how late it is. “Hey, It’s already late, I need to go home” Johnny call the waiter to ask for the bill.

“Wait! you never said how you confess to him!” Jaehyun call him out with face so red.

“Gosh you’re insufferable, here let me call for a taxi for you, also I send letter and that’s it, happy?” Johnny paid the bill and call the taxi to get Jaehyun to his home. 

.

.

_ After the first rejection, he thought a lot about what Taeil said. Seriously losing something that becomes your habit will always mess your head, Johnny knows better than anyone about that.  _

_ The more he thinks about it, it makes more sense to him. _

_ At that time, Johnny just got a really bad breakup, his ego was really high, and he blames everyone but him. It tooks months to finally get over it, but even when he over that, sometimes he accidentally saw Doyoung and his mind just got blanks. Taeil is right when it’s not the right time for them. He was not ready, but he won't admit it. _

_ So he learned what he needs, to be patient. _

_ He learned that feelings could be complicated and weird, but that's just how feelings are. _

_ He let his ego cloud his judgment once, and Taeil realized this and now what he feels is shame. ashamed that he really acts childish in front of people that treat him with nothing but warmth. _

“He is the one that makes me realize that, relationship won't work if I only think about my feelings, I need to put the other feeling into my thoughts too, it’s a simple act that not much people do”

.

.

_**August** _

_ Taeil just came back from the campus and checked for the mail, when he saw one yellow envelope, it’s weird because he never received anything with a bright color envelope. _

_ He picked it up and saw the front of it. Then he sprints to his apartment, throws his shoes and bag and goes straight to the couch. _

  
  
  


_ To. My dearest, my happiness Taeil _

_ You know how you told me how you can’t love me a while ago. _

_ I think I understand that. I understand how rushed I am, I understand now that other people's feelings matter as much matter as it is mine. _

_ Distance really does something to you because every single thing that is here reminds me of you. _

_ When I see the keyboard here, I remember how you used to play keyboard and sing in the studio, beside me. _

_ I went to the library, and I could imagine that you were there, with me, with your laptop, notes, and hundreds of highlighter and sticky notes. _

_ The sit near the window in the cafe reminds me of our first meeting. _

_ Everytime I see a cat, I want to show it off to you, only to realize that we’re hundreds of kilometers away from each other. _

_ But my hearts always know, my hearts know that you are my home now. _

_ It wants you. _

_ I can’t give you anything now, but I just want to ask you something. _

_ Will you be my happiness? _

_ That way, I will always cherish you, miss you, love you. _

_ I will always wait for you, no matter what. _

_ Love, (waiting to be) yours _

_ Young-ho Suh _

_. _

_. _

  
  


“I’m home” Johnny put his shoes into the shoe rack and saw Taeil curled up on the couch, his paper spreads around him “Baby, you shouldn’t sleep here” He lift Taeil into his arm, carrying him to their bedroom. Taeil moves a little and open his eyes for a bit before he leans again on Youngho’s chest.

“Hmm, you’re home?” Taeil said while snuggling deeper to Youngho's neck, Youngho also take this chance to put his nose to Taeil’s hair. He loves Taeil shampoo scent, it’s the brand that he loves since college.

“Yeah, why did you stay up late and sleep there? You should really go to bed or you gonna hurt your back”

“Ngghhh....the prof want more references...and you’ll come back anyway” This is not the first nor the second time Taeil slept on the sofa waiting for Youngho, one time Youngho ask him since he don’t want his boyfriend body to be in pain every time he wake up and Taeil only answer this. “You will come home and bring me to bed right? Why should I spend my energy walking when you are there to pick me up? Minimum power, maximum result!” And Taeil just laughs with his pretty eyes and smile.

“Hah.....I really don’t know what to do with you” Youngho kisses His forehead, and puts Taeil into the bed, the latter goes straight away to snuggle with the bedcover.

“Youngghoooo where are youuu” Taeil reach his hand, searching for something that gonna warmed up his sleep

“I’m smell, I’m going to wash up and go back there in a minute”

“Noooooo I want you here nowwwww”

Youngho wash up quickly and change his clothes, and come back to Taeil, he knows how clingy his boyfriend is when he sleepy “I’m here now, I’m here”

“Hmmmm” Taeil open his arm and Johnny welcomed himself into it, becoming a big spoon even with small size. But Johnny loves this anyway, he loves being there inside his lover's embrace, patting his head until he is asleep, and putting his hand on his husband’s waist, he loves how warm he is.

This is his home now.

\- E N D -

_Bonus scene:_

_Scene 5, Taeil's Letter_

_ Dear, My happiness _

_ I first want to apologize for taking too much time to reply to your letter, but I’ve been thinking a lot about your letter, your first confession, your feeling, my heart. I read the letter over and over again within these 2 weeks, and I tried to be real you know? I tried to search for logic between all these feelings. So in the end I search for reasons on why I shouldn’t accept you first. _

_ But I can’t find anything _

_ It’s also the first time that I might want to be selfish with you. For my happiness, for **our happiness.** _

_ Because no matter what, my heart tells me it's always you. _

_ I know that I might not be your first nor your last, but I want to be part of your home, the place that you can rest your life, the place that we can share our difficulties, I’m ready to give all my heart to you even with all the uncertainties, I’m pretty sure right now, there is no other right place to put this heart other than yours. _

_ Where will I found anyone that as willing as you, as sincere as you, as loving as you, I can't even answer that question, because there's you. Why do I search for anyone when you are there.  _

_ If you read this letter just know that yes, I want to be your happiness… _

_ As long as you can be mine? _

_ Call me :) _

_ Love you, Your happiness _

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Kudos and comments are always appreciated!!! :D


End file.
